| geboren 9.12.1907 - gestorben 31.1.1984
Steht nicht an meinem Grab und weint,
Ich bin der Wind über brausender See,
Steht nicht an meinem Grab und weint, |
"Irgendwo über den Bergen Muss meine ferne Heimat sein." Hermann Hesse
| geboren 9.12.1907 - gestorben 31.1.1984
Steht nicht an meinem Grab und weint,
Ich bin der Wind über brausender See,
Steht nicht an meinem Grab und weint, |
She was the one who waited patiently for you to come around, to finally give yourself to her completely and realize that she's the one for you. She was the one who supported you in everything you did and you just took her for granted. Now you've lost her and you regret not being able to tell her how much you cared for her and how much you loved her. Now it's too late for could haves, would haves and should haves.
You probably thought that she would never even think about leaving you because you knew she loved you with her whole heart. You probably thought that she will stick by your side and that you still had time to have some more fun. She may be patient, but she's not a fool, she wasn't going to wait for you forever. She's proud and strong and she knows that she's worth much more than you gave her credit for. She mustered the strength and walked away, even though she loved you truly. She just couldn't take your lies and excuses anymore and she couldn't wait for you any longer.
She was naïve enough to think that you will change over time, that you will realize she's the best thing that has happened to you. She gave you all the chances she could but you just took her for granted. All she did is believe in you and your love, and all you did is fail her trust each and every time. Time and time again she forgave your misgivings and she hoped that there will be no next time. She hoped that this will be the last time you've caused her pain and that you'll finally give her the respect that she deserves. But time and time again she was wrong. That day never came and she just couldn't wait for it any longer.
She walked away and never looked back and there's just nothing you can do to change it. She will no longer tolerate your egoistic nature, your insecurities and your foolishness. She will no longer sacrifice herself for someone who doesn't appreciate her, for someone who doesn't know how to express his love, for someone who hasn't matured yet. She will no longer accept your lies and deceptions because she knows that she can have something much better. She knows that she deserves something much better, something that you will never be able to give to her.
She may be hurting, she may be in pain, but once the crying is over, she will pick herself up, dust herself off and carry on with her life. She will wipe away her tears and promise herself that she will never cry for you again. She will never let anyone else treat her badly again.
Now she starts to live again. Now she starts to love herself again, to reinvent herself and to rediscover her passions. She is finally free of your negativity, of your toxicity and she can live life to the fullest again. She can enjoy the little things, she can be happy and she can search for her soulmate. One day she will find the person who will light up her eyes and fall madly in love. She will love again and she will be loved the way she deserves.
You'll regret losing this beautiful, amazing woman who was ready to give herself to you completely. You'll regret losing this one-of-a-kind woman who was ready to be your partner and to spend her life with you. She was going to give it all to you, but you just didn't know how to cherish her.
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Ithaca has given you the beautiful voyage. Without her you would have never set out on the road. She has nothing more to give you. And if you find her poor, Ithaca has not deceived you. Wise as you have become, with so much experience, you must already have understood what Ithacas mean. --Constantine P. Cavafy |
I've read these consoling words many times, finding curious ambiguities in them ...
... und hier ist noch ein Propagandafilm mit Hans Albers:
... und hier kommen noch "Die Reiter von Deutsch-Ostafrika":
Ich wanderte im Jahre 1965 vom (k)alten Deutschland nach Australien aus. In Erinnerung an das alte Sprichwort "Gott hüte mich vor Sturm und Wind und Deutschen die im Ausland sind" wurde ich in 1971 im Dschungel von Neu-Guinea australischer Staatsbürger. Das kostete mich nur einen Umlaut und das zweite n im Nachnamen - von -mann auf -man.
Australien gab mir eine zweite Sprache und eine zweite Chance und es war auch der Anfang und das Ende: nach fünfzig Arbeiten in fünfzehn Ländern - "Die ganze Welt mein Arbeitsfeld" - lebe ich jetzt im Ruhestand in Australien an der schönen Südküste von Neusüdwales.
Ich verbringe meine Tage mit dem Lesen von Büchern, segle mein Boot den Fluss hinunter, beschäftige mich mit Holzarbeit, oder mache Pläne für eine neue Reise.
In der Zwischenzeit, falls Du mein Blog in der englischen Sprache lesen willst, besuche mich At Home at Riverbend.